//God is Always Near//Christ in the Single Life//

      Sunrise to sunset to sunrise again, God's faithfulness is evident in every moment of our lives. We may not feel his presence, but scripture is clear that He is always near. We are given glimpses of His nearness during the Children of Israel's dessert wanderings when he lead them by pillar of cloud by day and pillar of fire by night.

"And the Lord went before them by day in a pillar of cloud to lead them along the way, and by night in a pillar of fire to give them light, that they might travel by day and by night. The pillar of cloud by day and the pillar of fire by night did not depart from before the people." Exodus 13:21-22

We see Him walking in the garden with Adam and Eve. Again when the Holy Spirit came upon the believers at Pentecost in Acts 2 we see Christ's nearness to His children. The most physical time we ever see God's nearness to us is when He sent His pure unblemished son, Jesus, into our sinful impure world. He walked, taught, ate, slept and lived amongst His created beings and bridged the separation between God and man....forever. Oh how thankful I am for His desire to see those whom He's chosen come into His presence and be eternally near under His protective arm. 

    As I was driving to the gym today, thinking over the past few weeks of my life, I realized that without God as my savior, none of the crazy messes I make as a human would ever make sense. Relationships with people would be pointless (other than for self gratification, which would soon become unfulfilling), I would be unable to find contentment in my job, and the ability to look beyond what is happening in our government would no longer be present. His presence in my life is the most satisfying thing and I am happy to be able to run to Him 24/7 365.

   The last month as been one of the most unique times in my life when I've come face to face with my singleness. God placed me in some unique situations where I would be tested on how strong I would stand for His truth and what scripture says concerning guy-girl relationships. During this month, I would be asked what my opinion was on dating a non-believer. When asked by a non-believer if I'd dated much, I would be given a blank stare when I replied unashamedly "No, I haven't." (Many non-believers don't get why you'd save yourself for marriage thus it's okay to date around and play around). I was approached by an older gentleman from my church who without even knowing what my month had looked like, encouraged me to wait patiently on the Lord for God to bring the right man (if your a single girl in a church, I'm sure you've had this happen to you before, if not...it will come :P ). I  made//mistakes// and lived through them. I showed brashness in certain situations when patience and time would have been better. It was a month of learning. A time to grow in my ability to relate to others in my God given situation in life. Overall, it was a unique month full of growth in learning about my single life and how strong my most important relationship that I do have (with Christ) is. 

   Of course, hind sight is always 20/20, but I know God had/has a plan in it all. I have felt God's presence more in my life during the past couple months than I have ever before. I have become more grateful for Christ's work on the cross that wipes out all our mistakes, covers our blemishes, and leads us through relationship qualms. Christ is the father to the fatherless, the ultimate comforter, and the shoulder to lean on. I am truly grateful for my Main Man, Jesus. <3  May you find comfort in His tenderness as well, seek His face, daily commune with Him....blessings will abound.

   Because I have felt God's closeness more so the past few months, I can also say that I have grown by leaps and bounds in contentment. Though I look forward to the day when God calls me to stand side by side a man as his helpmate, I am also glad for this time in my life as a single person to pursue God, my ultimate groom, and learn more about His character and desire for my life. He is always there, standing by me, pursuing me, and ever forgiving me when mistakes are made. He is there for you as well, and will not let you fall out of His grasp. Praise Him!

  

  
  

Intentionality - The Way We Should Live Life

lifeonsugarhill.blogspot.com

  

  Living an intentional life, what does that exactly mean? Do we live our lives looking for ways to be intentionally sharing the gospel, eating right, working hard, making wise decisions with our money, and the relationships with others we have? Over the last few months, I've had to learn a lot about intentionality - starting work at 9:30 means I have more time in the morning to do my own thing, so instead of wasting the precious hours, I've decided to use them for working out, eating a healthy breakfast, and spending time in the bible. This is the first year where I finally feel like I have a winning morning routine, and let me tell you, it feels wonderful! These things didn't just fall into place though - especially my time in the word - they were all intentional decisions that I knew would benefit my physical and spiritual health in the long run.

    Much of life is this way, without intentionality, many things would never get done. Good example is the state of my bedroom - 95% of the time I never get in there to clean so it's a disaster zone - if I were to intentionally put aside time each day to work on it, it could be a dream to live in rather than a disaster! Below are some areas I've seen in my life I've had to work on and need to work on being intentional in. Let me tell you, for a person who flies by the seat of her pants half the time, intentionality doesn't come naturally...so as much as this is an encouragement to me, may it also encourage you!

Walk With the Lord

   A person's walk with the Lord is very personal, but we all know that getting into the Word each and every day takes perseverance and intentionality. We have to intentionally carve out time, pull ourselves away from the world around us, and take to heart what we read. When I was younger, I really thought that my time with the Lord had to be long and drawn out - I was leaning towards legalism - and that if it wasn't, I had failed in some way. As I've grown and matured in my walk with the Lord, I've come to realize that even if all I have is 10-15 minutes in a day, that is better than putting no time at all into my walk with the Lord.

   Something that really helped me in this area was a sermon series my pastor did back in the beginning of Fall last year. In the sermons series he talked about being a committed follower of Christ and that one of the signs of someone passionately pursuing Christ was their love for being in His word. Needless to say, at that time I was struggling just to get into scripture a couple of times a week. As I thought over his sermon though, Christ placed a desire on my heart to daily spend time with Him, my best friend. Oh how sweet it is to commune with my Lord. I can now say it has become one of my favorite times of day.

   I say all this - not out of pride, for it is not in my own power I am able to do this - rather, it is Christ who gave me the desire and the job (that gave me more time in the morning) to put into spending time with Him. Let me encourage you, intentionally follow Christ each and every day. Put in a CD with scripture being read while driving, use even moments in the bathroom (seriously) to read if needed, take time on your lunch break to delve into the Word....if you look, you'll find moments in your day you didn't know you had. You will find immense blessing in your walk with the Lord if you do so and your whole outlook on life will slowly start to change for the better. Sin will be revealed, the desire to confess the sin, and the ability to walk in God's grace will give you a peace that passes all understanding.

Health/Exercise/Eating      Philippians 4:13 - "I can do all things through him who strengthens me."

   Sour gummy worms, french fries, frosting, chips, crackers, brownies, cupcakes.....I could go on and on about the junk food I like - seriously, my good friend Jessie and I will even talk about junk foods while working out! It's pathetic! With all that said though, as much as I love the taste of sour gummy worms (my most favorite candy), eating healthy has been a work in progress - produced mainly from some health issues I've faced and the realization that without them, I feel much better. Just because I know said foods aren't good for me doesn't mean I can automatically say no to eating them. I've had to intentionally, with the help of the Lord, put my mind to it and learn to walk away from foods I so strongly desire to eat. Being okay with eating vegetables for breakfast, salads at lunch and dinner, and few carbs gets easier over time - a long time - but realizing that struggle is a part of life and the pay off is worth it helps. You WILL see results once you start eating healthy within a matter of days - guaranteed.

   Eating healthy goes hand-in-hand with exercise. A quote from a friend of mine's brother that we've laughed at time and again is this, "Ab's aren't made in the gym, they're made in the kitchen!" - Laugh now, but it's true. You can work your abs - crunches, rowing, swimming, cardio - and if your not eating healthy you will won't see great results. I know this from personal experience! So, if your not into exercise and don't have a gym membership, remember, even getting out and walking a few times a week is better than nothing at all - do some push-ups, crunches, and lunges in your own home even! You can do it!!!! If you are into working out, good for you! Your heart and body will thank you now AND later in life! Combine your exercise with healthy eating habits and not only with the weight come off more quickly, you'll have better stamina and feel better overall.

    So, whether your a dreamer of exercising, a part time gym goer, or a committed endorphin junky, remember that where you want to be or where you are takes/took intentionality. Focus on scripture and the truths of His word while doing those things that are hard, and you will find a strength you didn't know you had.

Relationships   Philippians 2:3-4 "Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others."

   As a single person, your probably wondering what could I possibly have to say about relationships. I probably have quite a bit, not that any of it would make sense, but come on people - I'm a social person who thinks about relationships quite often! Now, we all know that relationships are more than just romantic...in fact, we are all in relationship with multiple people at all times in our life, maybe not lovey dovey ones, but the friendships with co-workers, church people,family, and whoever else we may let in to the more carefree side of ourselves all fall into the category of "relationships". Relationships must be intentional as well or else they will fall away, be superficial, and ultimately, the gospel will not be shown - both to believers and non-believers. All relationships need to be pursued with the gospel centrally focused in. As a believer, I know from scripture that my job is to proclaim the gospel, live in unity with my fellow bro's and sis's in the Lord, and take every opportunity to exhort and encourage those around me. Can all this be accomplished if we are lazily sitting at home, watching tv by ourselves? Let me spell the answer out for you - N-O ...it's just not possible. So, let me encourage you today to pursue someone today who you've maybe not talked to in a while, or that person you wish you could just know a little bit better. You will never regret it, especially if you do so in the name of the Lord and for His glory!


Work

   At the beginning of the school year I was blessed with a job at the local school district working with the disabled community. If you know anything about me and my love for those God has blessed a little differently in life than the average person, I was exhilarated. I felt like God had finally opened a door into a new path that would be exactly what I wanted (little did I know!). After 3 weeks of working at my new job, things got extremely difficult with one of my students who has sever autism. I felt threatened on a daily bases, my emotions were a roller coaster every day with the highest point never feeling very high and the lowest point being a constant flow of tears and I had no clue what I was doing or what I should be doing to help the situation.
   
   After struggling through the situation for a few months, never knowing if I would finish working with this student and come out physically unharmed, I began to realize that if I wanted to have a changed heart - I was feeling a strong dislike for my situation and student - I needed to be intentionally taking it to the Lord in prayer. At first I didn't even know what to pray for other than my safety, but eventually I began to realize that my main goal needed to be working with him in a way that the light of Christ would shine through my actions. I then began to pray for him specifically, and things began to change. I am praising God right now that though we still have rough times - okay, several of them - and though I still find it hard to make myself show up and work with him, there has been improvement and a new excitement in his eyes to work hard at his behavior. I have seen God answer un-prayed for prayers as well as prayed for ones...and let me tell you, we serve a faithful God.

   So, let me encourage you today, if your struggling to find fulfillment in your job, find it difficult to work with some of your co-workers, you wish you could be on a higher pay scale, or your a stay-at home mom who is struggling to raise your child(ren)- whatever it may be - intentionally seek the face of your King in prayer and He will be faithful to answer!

Your Looking For What in a Spouse? ~ Part 2 of 2

"A husband is to take on the responsibilities of leadership, a wise husband realizes real leadership requires a lot of listening." Dennis Rainey

   Last week I wrote a post concerning what young women should be looking for in a spouse. I based what I wrote off of a radio broadcast put out by Family Life Today. You can find the link here for the one I used to write this post. As I've listened to these broadcasts, I've come to the realization that though each one is specifically geared to separate genders, I as a girl can been encouraged specifically when listening to the one geared toward guys. I've seen I have lots of room to grow in being a woman that lives in a way that honors the Lord. So, weather your a guy or a girl, may you be encouraged!

~~~

   Biblically, the man is held accountable as the leader in his home. Men need to step forward and be the man God calls them to be, and women need to encourage them in this. Genesis 2:18 says, "Then the Lord God said,  "“It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for^e him.”" A women's main objective is to be the cheerleader (helper) for her husband.

     1) A girl should have a personal relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ. (Note: same as previous article has for first)

        ~  2 Corinthians 6:14 says, "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?" If a young women is not bowing before and acknowledging that the Lord is her God and King, will she do it later in marriage? 

    2) Beauty is deeper than the skin

      ~ Alistair quickly made the point that just because beauty is deeper than the skin, it doesn't mean that you need to be searching for someone who is unattractive, just don't make that the priority. The priority should be looking for a girl with a meek and quiet spirit.

      ~ A natural radiance comes from time spent with the Lord, not from a bottle (of makeup). 

      ~(side note) If your a girl reading this, remember, God has created you just the way you are. Though it's not wrong to put time and energy into your outward appearance, don't bash yourself just because you don't look like the girl next to you. We are each unique and are all created in the Image of God!

  
  3) A girl should be an initiative taker with an attitude of submission 

       ~She works hard with her own initiative. She can pick up and finish a task without needing to be told. 

       ~ She should not be a bossy self opinionated person, she should serve willingly. A good way to know if a woman is cultivating this is to look at her relationship she has with her father.

      

   4) A girl should be a builder of confidence in others (eventually her husband)
       ~ She should dress in a way that shows she's not trying to be deliberately seductive. 
       ~She encourages him

   5) She displays {Kindness} that touches others
       ~ She shows this by expressing compassion and by holding a special tenderness towards others.
      ~ She's not afraid of being distinctly different that the opposite sex...she embraces her femininity. 

    6) She has a sense of humor that would help a marriage brave adversity.
      ~ A couple that can laugh together can get through rough spots much easier.

    At the end of the broadcast, Dennis Rainey came on and summed up this topic with his own list of things a girl should possess if your considering her as your spouse. At some level, I found them a little more helpful and to the point....enjoy! :)

  ~ Fears God and hopes in the Lord
  ~Honors her parents - it's easy to bring extra baggage into a relationship, don't let this be an area where that is the case. Look for someone who is good with relationships.   
  ~ Ability to ask for forgiveness and admits when she is wrong
  ~ She has a desire to be a wife and mother - not career oriented. She views her #1 ministry to be her husband and children. Ephesians 5 and Titus 2 are excellent chapter in the bible to do a deeper study on this.
  ~ Her character is displayed in her modest dress
  ~ She knows how to follow a man - she has a vice president mentality. A young woman needs to be able to follow even in decisions she doesn't agree with. She views her husband as the head of the home. 


~~~

     I know I have been encouraged by this, and I hope you are to. As a young lady, I hope I can better prepare myself for one day being married. Practice by learning to be in community with others by loving God who will help you love others!

  ~Blessings~

Your Looking for What In a Spouse? ~ Part 1 of 2

“A good marriage is the union of two forgivers.” - Ruth Bell Graham

 

    Earlier this week I turned on a radio talk show series of Family Life Today that was in their archive. The topic of this broadcast was “Instructions to Women” (and I think good for guys as well) and I was excited to find that the speaker was Alistair Beg, someone who I've really come to enjoy and respect for his teaching and encouragement. In this broadcast, Alistair takes on a fatherly tone and exhorts the single women in his audience in the area of relationships, specifically, guy-girl relationships. I thought I would share with you some of what I was encouraged with.

   Though I grew up in a Christian home and am still able to enjoy seeing what a God glorifying relationship looks like through my parents, I know that many young women have not had that same privilege, thus their view or opinion of what to be looking for in a future spouse may be skewed. Even if you do have parents that are still married and love the Lord, it is always good to be encouraged in this area! Guys, if your reading this as well, I truly think this is just as good for you guys as it is for us girls!

   First and foremost, a young man needs to be committed to growing in a relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ. Does he fear God? Pslam 111:10 says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom;
all those who practice it have a good understanding. His praise endures forever!” This is important for MANY reasons. A young man who you are interested in marrying will at some point be your shepherd and guide should you one day get married. To put it bluntly, he will be the spiritual leader of your family. 1 Corinthians 11:3 says, “But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God.” 

  Second, he must be an individual of obvious integrity. He is honest to a fault. Don't you think that a person who struggles with lying and deception now will put that all aside once they are married? Old patterns die hard and a young man who falls into that trap now will much more easily lie to his wife later on. Now, what about the fact that we are all sinful and all struggle with different things? Alistair gives room for growth but says that if it is pointed out to him and he argues about it and tries to justify himself, you'd be better off to “kiss him goodbye” now as it will be to late later.

   Third, he needs to be a man who can lead boldly. Are you pursuing him or is he pursuing you? Can he make decisions by himself after weighing out his options? Alistair also exhorts girls not to settle for a leader who's decisions are domineering or selfish. This character trait is marked by an attitude of servitude and a willingness to submit to leadership. Does he seek the council and listen to older and wiser men?

   Fourth, he should display the ability to love sacrificially. This is detected in subtle ways such as, is he willing to jump in and help clean after a gathering and does he open doors for people with full arms? These are just a few ways, definitely not an exhaustive list. 

 

   Fifth, does he have to ability to laugh heartily? Can he laugh at his own mistakes and be okay with not being the hero of every situation? Look at his own humor, is it cruel or crass? (If your attracted to that kind of humor, you might want to take a careful look at your own heart and ask yourself why. Pray that the Lord would change that in you.)

   Sixth, which is last but not least, does he model genuine humility? Is he focused on others and their needs or does he predominantly focused on himself? Is he okay with another competitors success? Can he play second fiddle and not be the highlight of a party?

   Now, as I was writing this, I realized that some of you might be thinking, “Well, these are all good, but isn't this expecting to much out of a young man?” The conclusion I have come to myself in this area that they need to be showing an active desire to be growing in these areas. No one is perfect, I for sure am not perfect, therefore grace must be given.

   At the end of the broadcast, the host came on and added a few of his own encouragements, some of which I threw in with Alistair's. Two of them though I thought I would add separately as one is a delicate topic and not one I'm willing to get into and the second was good but didn't fit in with any of the other points.

1. Is the young man in control of his passions? He should not be looking to self satisfy and has a control on his emotions and desire for the opposite sex. If a young man is asking you to compromise your morals and biblical beliefs in the area of purity? If so, flee!
2. He should honor is parents. If it's important enough to have that rule in the 10 Commandments, is important enough to put it on this list. The way he treats his mom, will one day be similar to how he treats you. When he's with his dad, though he may not agree, he still respects him and shows him honor.

   I hope you were encouraged by this, I know I was when I listen to the broadcast. Don't think though that us girls are getting off scot free! Alistair also has a message on what girls should be and what young men need to be looking for in a spouse that I'm hoping to share with you soon. So, be prepared for some heart searching of your own!

~Blessings~